
Sometimes moving on (break up, loss or other major change)
is difficult. It’s rarely easy unless
you’re so glad to get out of a situation that you can’t wait to make changes
and move on. A break up disrupts your
whole life. Everything you do and see
seems to remind you of your ex. If you
had many mutual friends, even going out to keep from going stir crazy can be
difficult.
One of the biggest hurdles you have to face when you’re
ready to move on is your family and friends.
If your ex was popular with your family, you’re going to get tired of
questions about the situation. You must
explain to them that you’re moving on, break up is over, and that you don’t
appreciate constantly being reminded of your ex and the past relationship.
Sometimes this is difficult for family to deal with. They want to keep bringing up the person in
the hopes that you’ll get back together.
You can just explain, “Moving on, break up is over, that’s that.” Eventually they’ll come around because
they’re your family and they love you.
It’s probably going to be harder to deal with when it comes to your
friends.
If you didn’t have many mutual friends, then it should be
less of a problem. But if the two of you
often hung out with the same group of people, then you going alone to be with
those friends is going to seem strange to everyone for a while. And then
there’s the problem of your ex wanting to hang out with the friends, too. You might even run into each other as you
each attempt to hang out with your mutual friends. This doesn’t mean that it’s necessary when
you’re moving on break up with your friends.
It’s just simply going to be more difficult to maintain some of those
friendships once the relationship is over.
As difficult as it seems, when you say, “Moving on, break up
is history,” you may have to give up some of those friendships. You and your ex may each have to keep in
touch with only certain friends in your group of mutual friends. Just try to maintain good contact and
relationships with those you’re closest to and allow your ex to do the same
with the others. While this can be painful, it’s probably easiest on everyone
because they don’t have to choose which of you to be loyal to and which to
avoid.
Sometimes the “moving on break up” period is just too difficult
when you’re surrounded by mutual friends and so many places to go
together. If possible, go on a vacation
to get away from the same scenery and people.
Take a vacation with a friend who isn’t involved in the situation; maybe
a friend of yours who wasn’t friends with your ex. This can help you get some perspective. Once
you’ve declared, “moving on; break up over” then if you can take some time away
it can help you a great deal.
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